A Tale of Two Movies

Now Playing: Partners in Rhyme - Teri Meri

Before we get to the main course, ladies and gentlemen, let me draw aside the curtain of my mind (is that a song lyric?) and give you some insight into my train of thought:

• Stephen and I are chatting.
• Stephen remarks on the catchiness of Bhangra, having just been introduced to it.
• I refer him to the Bend it like Beckham soundtrack, which has some very catchy bhangra tunes on it.
• I remember one non-Bhangra tune on the album that I like, a Partners in Rhyme' remix of a Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan song called tere bin nahin lagda.
• I decided to see what Partners in Rhyme have done since then.
  
• I stumble across a track called teri meri (literally, yours and mine).
• I press play.
  
• The song is ridiculously addictive. It's like musical crack.
• I can't stop playing it!
  

Which is why I've always said Bhangra is dangerous. No good can come of it, ever.

Anyway, saw two movies adapted from novels recently; loved one, was utterly meh about the other.

any guesses?

The first one I saw was Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I have to admit that I was completely psyched for this one up front. The trailer looked amazing, the book has arguably the best twist in any of the HP books so far, and there was going to be an amazing bouncing ferret!!! So Linda, my brother & I trooped down to Paramount to watch the movie. We figured that if we waited till its second week of playing, we'd miss most of the crowds - a fairly logical idea, except that most of downtown Toronto came up with the exact same thing, and so we had to toss stray children out of the way in our over-zealous quest for good seats. After all of this, the movie has to be awesome, right? I wish.

In their quest to streamline the movie, Newell et al threw out whole chunks of the book, thereby junking some of my favourite scenes from the book. We don't get to see Skeeter being a complete bitch and Hermione figuring out her secret - and frankly, with what little screentime they did give Miranda Richardson, I'm surprised they didn't just cut her out entirely), we don't get any of the comedic gold that was S.P.E.W, and then they overextend the first task by having Harry be chased all over Hogwarts by that crotchety Hungarian Horntail. Pshaw. Also left out is the Defence Against the Dark Arts class where we find that Harry is mostly resistant to the Imperius curse, which is probably one of my favourite Harry-scenes from the book. Then finally, the confrontation with Not!Moody at the very end - they don't show the spyglass! Why go to all the trouble of pointing out the nifty little magical device in which you can see your foes approaching you - if you're not going to actually show the foes approaching in the damn thing??? That scene in the book always struck me as one that would look cool on film - three faces slowly growing clearer, until finally Dumbledore, McGonagall and Snape burst through the doors of Not!Moody's office - and they left it out! In all fairness, I should say the movie is really not half-bad, especially for those who haven't read the books. That first sight of the dark mark towards the beginning of the movie was effectively and entirely creepy, the acting was good, etc - but I have to ask: Why are the filmmakers shoving Harry & Hermione down our throats? I mean, c'mon anyone who's read the books know that Ron 'n' Hermione are the canon couple, so what're they playing at?

Anyway, the other movie that I saw - and loved - was Pride and Prejudice. Now, it's no secret that I adore this book. It's the one book that I have found impossible to "read-out" - whereby I read a book so often that by the end of the whole process, it's as if I've drained the thing dry, and there's nothing left on those dog-eared pages for me anymore. This is what happened with Oliver Twist, Sense and Sensibility, Jane Eyre even - I can't read those books anymore. Not Pride and Prejudice. I have read the book any number of times, seen all the assorted film versions - of the list on that page, I've seen all of them except the Mormon version & the assorted BBC versions pre-1980, and I'm here to tell you, this new version more than holds its own.

Where to start? Okay, it's not a romantic comedy, a la the Olivier and Garson version; this one is a romance, from start to finish. But before my male readership decamps in alarm, they should know this movie is really well made technically - long, lovely tracking shots a la Serenity, and wonderful piano music by Jean-Yves Thibaudet. And the script - now, this is how you condense a novel well. Gone are the Hursts, the little Gardiners, the sundry Lucases (Charlotte, obviously is indispensable, but the only other Lucas one sees is Sir William at the Assembly Ball, and only in passing), Mrs Phillips, etcetera - the story and the cast is pared down to the barest essentials. The acting is wonderful - I really hadn't expected Keira Knightley to be able to pull it off as well as she did, but how glad I am to be wrong. Her Elizabeth is clever, irrepressible and girlish - something that could not be said of her predecessors in the role, Jennifer Ehle and Greer Garson. Matthew MacFadyen is perfect as Darcy - taciturn, intrigued & passionate by turns. Comparisons to Colin Firth are inevitable, but MacFadyen more than holds his own. The supporting actors - Donald Sutherland, Brenda Blethyn, Rosamund Pike, et al all do justice to their parts. Quite seriously, it is a wonderful movie, and one you ought to watch.

Wow, I've really run on here, haven't I?

Yours garrulously,

Sharon

A Month Till Christmas...

... and the tree is up!

Update, I must!

Now Playing: Serenity - End Credits

I've had another birthday! Woohoo! Over the penultimate solar sojourn (Steve, I know you'll get this one) I've grown even more decripit and useless! Yay!

*sigh*

I'll just go off into this corner and die, shall I?

Anyway, Linda, Julia, Mimmie, Steph and I met up on a Saturday to jointly celebrate both Linda's birthday and mine. But what was to be done? The cinemas were bereft of quality viewing (NB - this was before Pride and Prejudice opened) and we were at a loss. Bowling? For a lark, I say, "hey, why not karaoke?" and am horrified when they take me seriously (honestly, don't you hate when that happens?) and soon we are on our way to Echo Karaoke in the middle of Chinatown.

Chaos ensued.

By which I mean, we spent six hours at the Karaoke place, screeching our lungs out. :D To be entirely fair, I was the only one screeching; Linda, Julia and Steph were remarkably tuneful, while Mimmie (oh, wise, sage, most august Mimmie!) refused to sing at all. In any case, it was a delightful time, despite my incessant mike-hogging and yowling. We only stopped because the place was closing, and also towards the end, my vocal cords were tap-dancing in an attempt to get me to shut up. Oddly enough, the next day, I was still in possession of my voice, though attempts to sing in Church failed miserably.

Before that, though, the frater and I went to see Serenity. For those five of you who've been living under a rock (heeey! what's it like down there?) Serenity is the movie continuation of Joss Whedon's untimely cancelled TV show, Firefly. The movie is pretty damn awesome and the fact that it did poorly at the boxoffice is, I think, a damning indictment of the tastes of moviegoers in North America today. I mean, you know the universe is fundamentally unfair when the Scooby-doo movie gets a sequel (wtf? seriously, wtf?), and this movie tanked. Anyway, if you get a chance and it's still playing at a theatre near you; you really ought to watch it - it's different, daring and pretty gorram entertaining.

Really, really want to watch Pride & Prejudice, but alack, have no one to see it with me. It's really odd how none of my female friends here have read the book. (Hem, I'm going to assume you have?) I mean, this is quite possibly my favourite book ever, and yet I am surrounded by people who have never read this seminal text! My anthro prof over the summer, Ivan Kalmar, pinpointed this book as the ancestor of all those romance novels in which Guy meets Girl, they hate each other and then fall in love and roll around in haystacks, or whatever it was people did before the internet. Its TV descendants include tropes such as "Will They Won't They" and the niftily named "Slap Slap Kiss." What's particularly funny to me is how guys recoil utterly from the idea of watching this movie. To wit:

Guy: I want to see Pride and Prejudice this weekend.
Me: *goggling in shock*
Guy: It doesn't seem to be playing at any of the big theatres downtown
Me: *even more shock*
Guy: Yeah, my girlfriend wants to see it, not me.
Me: Ah.
Guy: Yeah.
Me: All is made clear.

I don't think there'll be the same paucity of companions when I go to see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. I was dismayed at first to read that there had been significant cuts to the novel, but my fears have been assuaged - they left the ferret scene in! How awesome is that? The amazing bouncing ferret is in!!!

*ahem*

must be off,

Yours distractedly,

Sharon

Irony and Incompetence

Now Playing: Depeche Mode - Precious

The College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario is holding a disciplinary hearing for a Toronto gynecologist. A medical expert testified that there were problems with 37 out of 70 hospital cases administered by the gynecologist. Some of the more stunningly egregious errors include performing a tubal ligation on a woman who was already pregnant & nicking a patient's bowels during surgery. This isn't the first time this gynecologist has been in trouble; in 2001 he had a disciplinary hearing in which he was accused of mis-prescribing mistoprol and missing the diagnosis of a ruptured uterus & falsifying records among other things. All in all, the man seems fairly incompetent.

So why do I bring this up, you wonder? There was one detail about the case that struck me as being deliciously ironic. The doctor in question is a Sankar Vaidyanathan, a name that seems fairly innocuous until you consider the etymology of his name. In Sanskrit, "Vaidya" means physician, as it does in Hindi.

Yours in inappropriate chortling,

Sharon

Material Girl

Now Playing: Ivy - Ocean City Girl

In their November issue, Toro Magazine ran a feature comparing headphones, and now me want. I mean, I was doing fine with the earbuds that came with my mp3 player, but now I really crave/want/desire/need a pair of good headphones. This Denon one is the most affordable of the lot, but it's still not what I'd term a casual purchase. The Bose headphones are much pricier, but just so pretty. In the just-plain-outrageous range is this one from Grado Labs; honestly, who needs hand-crafted mahogany headphones? According to Toro, though, the sound is like a pair of hi-fi angels cooing in your ear, so I suppose you get what you pay for.

*sigh*

Yours in fiscal inadequacy,

Sharon.

Not a good human being?

Now Playing: Lakshya - Agar Main Kahoon

So the other day, I'm waiting for the Spadina Streetcar and there's this woman with a pram (that's "stroller" in Canadian!) waiting ahead of me. When it's her turn to get on, she makes a few abortive stabs at getting the thing on board, and then glares around at the rest of us till someone helps her get on. Now, normally, I'd agree with her - but this woman, in addition to having a one-and-a-half-year-old on board, also had three full bags of groceries stashed in the pram. Asking someone to help you get your baby on board is asking them to act in the spirit of decency; asking them to carry your groceries for you as well is asking them to be volunteer sherpas.

We didn't have a car for the longest time, either, so everytime we went grocery shopping at costco's and bought tons of food, we knew better than to take the TTC, and expect our fellow riders to carry our jumbo-sized honey-nut cheerios on for us - we'd take cabs instead. Is that so radical an idea?

Yours in uncaringness,

Sharon

Procrastination & Memory

Now Playing: Three Dog Night - One is the loneliest number

My earliest memory is this - being brought back to earth by a teacher after daydreaming in class. Before that, as expected, everything is a blank slate, but what surprises me is what came after - I remember looking in a mirror and being surprised to see the face I saw. It seems now that I only assumed my identity after that, which begs the question - who, or what, was I before? Have I always been Sharon, or am I only the current occupant? Is it possible that one day I will float off into a reverie and another Sharon will be rudely jolted back to earth? If so, where will I go - join my predecessor, or go somewhere entirely different?

... and then I remember I have a chemistry midterm to study for, and with a sigh, I put aside my musings and pick up my textbook.

Ficlet!

Now Playing: Ivy - Feel So Free

So I finally get around to spreading the meme Hem tagged me with ages ago. Honestly, I'm such a procrastinator about some things, and yet so prompt with others. Do you see me waiting to spread my cold germs? *gets buried under onslaught of pointy things thrown by people who have caught colds from me*

So here's what you have to do: write a short story in 55 words or less - a ficlet, really! I tag Vince, Chris, Mary, Purva & Ali - but everyone else is still welcome to have a go. If you are of the blog-deficient sort, feel free to use my comments section.

Here's my stab at the thing (first posted in Hem's comment section):

Wolves At The Door

There was no escape from this, she thought, more with resignation than with despair. It was time to end things. Cold steel would finish the job utterly and finally.

She took a deep breath, picked up the scissors and began to cut up her credit cards, one by one.

To the WordCount!Mobiles, people!

A Vignette In Search Of A Plot

So here's an attempt of mine at writing fiction - there's not much in the way of plot, really - but please read it anyway, and constructive criticism will be much appreciated.

(There's not even a title yet, actually!)

She awoke, warm under the blankets, to a few moments of blessed respite before cold grief wrapped around her heart again. She shuddered and tried to burrow deeper into the warm pile, but to no avail; memory, tenacious and unforgiving, would not let her rest. Nothing for it then, but to get out of bed and face the day – no matter how cold the tiles are no matter we’re almost out of toothpaste no matter I want to do nothing but weep – abruptly, she swung out of bed and walked to the bathroom. “We are almost out of toothpaste,” she noted, as she stumbled about the bathroom, toes curling in the cold. Suddenly, it hit her, as it had done almost hourly for a month now – that there was no we anymore. There was no more Jim and Lauren now; it was just her, standing in a cold bathroom, blinking hard to stop the tears that would wash her away again. The floods receded, and she was left holding on the sides of the basin, wondering what Jim would say to the pale face staring back at her from the mirror. Sweetheart, you know I love you, but the creature of the night look is not for you. So why don’t you go outside, get a tan? I’d come too, you know, but this whole death business is keeping me busy. She splashed water on her face and once again took stock of her reflection. Look. You had a life before Jim and you’ll get by without him. Turning on her heel, she left the bathroom, ignoring the inner voice wailing that it didn’t want to get by.

In the kitchen, she poured herself some cereal and began to eat. The cereal was Jim’s favourite – he’d stockpiled cartons of it, saying, look, what if they decide to stop making this brand? Seeing Lauren’s skeptical glance, he’d continued, honey, there are three things I cannot live without – hockey, this cereal, and you. She’d retorted that if he thought putting her on the same level with a food product was a compliment, he ought to reconsider his priorities, but in the end, she’d relented. Now, alone in the kitchen he’d never gotten around to painting, she felt the grief and anger make a fresh onslaught. He’d lied, hadn’t he? The hockey season is still on, they’re still making this stupid cereal, I’m here, and he’s not. I hate that he’s gone. I hate that I’m alone and I hate people sympathizing and I miss him so much – and she found herself once again putting a brake on her train of thoughts. Enough wallowing in grief, she thought, I’ve done enough of that already. In the weeks right after his – right after that happened, she’d done nothing but cry and read poetry and cry some more. The poetry of grief had, in a strange way, served to comfort her, for it meant that other people had felt loss like hers and had survived. And yet, she mused, no one poet had captured grief completely; it was like the story of the blind men and the elephant. So I’ve been wrestling an elephant for the past month? No wonder I look like shit. The thought made her smile, but the ringing of the doorbell left her no time to ponder how strange and traitorous it was to be smiling again.

“Who, who, who could that be?” she wondered as she walked to the door. Are we – fuck, fuck, I meant, am I expecting someone? Before she put her hand on the doorknob, she heard her sister’s voice, “Lauren! It’s Meg! I’ve got coffee, donuts and a bunch of things with lotsa sugar in ’em!” Of course - Meg! Her sister made a point of calling to check on her every other day, and had visited her every Saturday morning since – and it wasn’t just her; their parents checked in on Lauren as well, bringing food as offering to appease the hungry grief that ate at her. As she unlocked the door, it came to her that all these visits had done little to assuage her sorrow. Hers was a private torture – she could not explain to anyone the bitterness of her solitude, and neither would she wish such an understanding on a soul. Without Jim, she felt alone even in a room full of family and friends, as she had at the funeral. She had sat there, dressed in a black dress her mother had found for her, and all the sincerely-meant condolences and sympathies had buzzed dully in her ears as she stared at the coffin that – but her fumbling fingers finally managed to undo the locks, and she pulled the door open. Meg barged in, hands full with gifts of caffeine and sugar and Lauren relieved her of the dangerously tottering packages. They sat in the kitchen in silence, sipping their coffee, until Meg blurted, “This is weird, huh?” Lauren froze. Did her sister have no tact? Of course things were weird, her husband was dead! Before she could open her mouth to yell, Meg continued, “look, we’re in a house, with china and all that, and we’re still drinking our coffee out of paper cups. Tell me that’s not weird?” Weird is where this conversation almost went, Lauren thought, but aloud, all she said was, “The mugs are in the cabinet next to the fridge, if you want them.” Her sister didn’t get up, though, and Lauren shot her an inquiring look. Meg shrugged. “Eh, I don’t want to have to do any washing up. I’ll just, you know, have to live with the weirdness.” Lauren shrugged in return. “Suit yourself. Where’d you get these donuts, anyway?”

As Meg plunged into an animated description of the oh-so-divine bakery she’d stumbled onto just a few blocks away, Lauren could tell that Meg was grateful for the conversational lifeline. Her sister had never been able to handle awkward silences; she had always been the one to break the arctic quiet that was the aftermath of one of their parents’ fights with a silly joke, or an anecdote about a friend, or even the latest sports news. It was, therefore, a perfectly Meg thing to be sitting there and babbling about the wonderful black forest cake at this new find of hers – wait a minute. “Hold on a sec, Meg – you hate black forest cake!” Meg grinned. “So you were paying attention, huh?” Lauren rolled her eyes, and got up. “My anti-Meg filter must be malfunctioning,” she said with the ends of her lips twitching upwards.

(And that's it. Read, Review, Rant - all of the above would be appreciated. thanks!)

All Roads Lead To Rantville

Now Playing: The Bravery - Hot Pursuit

I finally saw a play, & one that wasn't being produced by my high school at that - Hamlet by the Soulpepper Theatre at the Harbourfront Centre. It was awesome, really - the acting was note-perfect; intriguing, rivetting and immensely entertaining. The only weak link, if there was one, was the actress playing Ophelia, Patricia Fagan - and it wasn't so much that she was bad as the fact she seemed noticeably less intense than the other actors. Still, it was a hugely edifying experience, and it did afford me the opportunity to swan about the house and proclaim my immense cultured-ness -

Me: Look! I'm all cultured-like!
Family: Sadly, you didn't get all gramatical-like at the same time.

Oh, and the fencing was soooo cool, I was totally fan-girling. :D

So, rerun-hell has mostly ended & we have been granted fresh episodes of all the TV I'm woefully addicted to - so far House, CSI, ER. Let me just say that "Bros before hos, man!" is ample proof that the secret to a great line is not in the writing, but in the delivery.

Anyway, the thing about medical dramas and science-oriented shows that really bugs me is the exposition. You know, when two doctors discuss and explain the patient's condition in easy-to-understand terms for all the laymen watching? Granted, it's necessary, but it's just so clunky! I mean, here are two science professionals who should know all these details, so why are they even talking about it? I mean, every time I watch one of these shows, the exposition jars me out of the moment. *mutter grumble mutter* Anyhow, while I'm on the subject of TV-peeves, I may as well take the opportunity to bitch about how bloody annoying laugh-tracks on sitcoms are. I mean, it's like the show is telling you, "okay honey, this is the part where you're supposed to laugh - just in case you didn't notice how funny that line was." Okay, you know what? I'm not laughing cause your show ain't funny, jackasses!

So yeah, the problem with laugh-tracks is that they're incredibly patronizing, and there is nothing that annoys me more than people who patronize me, or tell me what I should or should not be doing, or talk down to me. I mean, it's the ultimate sign of lack of respect, isn't it? Gah. You know what? I respect other people, for the most part, and people who don't accord me the same respect - y'all can just fuck off.

Whoa. I have no idea where that rant came from, but I'm feeling a lot better now. Ze steam, she has left ze building!

Oh, and Hem is back! Again! :D

Off now. Ta!

More Pointless Blabbering for the Masses

Now Playing: Erik Satie - 1st Gnossienne

After the quizfest that was my last post, I think I've got the quiz bug out of my system. On to more pointless blabbering for the masses!

In the aftermath of the beef-in-black-bean-sauce debacle, I decided I had to get back in the culinary game, so I enlisted the help of Thangam Philip's Modern Cookery, Volume 2. Now, this is probably the oldest cookbook we have - it's tattered and falling apart, the instructions are no-nonsense & text-only, but the recipes work! My first attempt was a pork curry - took forever to prepare, but turned out alright. It got me to thinking - Indian Cooking is really dependent on women having nothing better to do. I mean, the pork curry took me around three hours from start to finish - what with frying, blending and simmering - and this is today, when we have electric blenders and ready-ground spices, as opposed to when you had to grind the spices yourself using a heavy grindstone. Anyway, my latest effort, Chicken Rogini is my masterpiece - it's chicken in a creamy yogurt and cashew sauce. Deeelicious!

New TV show with potential: Prison Break. The first hour was a bit annoying - "watch Wentworth Miller and his steely glare!" - but as the second hour progressed, and it turned out that jail is a bit much for even Michael "anticipate-every-contigency" Scofield to handle - well, I'll be watching from now on. It doesn't hurt that Wentworth Miller is really easy on the eyes.

Finally saw Paheli & I loved it (except for the gratuitous CGI). It's photographed beautifully, and Shah Rukh Khan and Rani Mukherjee are awesome together (plus SRK in a moustache? teehee!). Also saw Dus. The less said about that one, the better. I mean, it has Abhishek Bachchan and Zayed Khan (who can't act, but he's easy on the eyes) but the sheer implausibility of the plot and the emphasis of style over substance ruin a movie that could have been pretty darn awesome.

Sanjay Dutt and Abhishek Bachchan in Dus (Indian anti-terrorism agents never take off their holsters, not even at the office,and yet, the lines of their suits aren't ruined.)

Zayed Khan in Dus (he doesn't take off the shades even when he's defusing a bomb and he emotes like he's stoned, but hey, he's cute!)

That's it for me - ciao, people!

Sabotage and Chinese Unicorns

Ultimate Sabotage, baby! Yeh koi maamooli sabotage nahin hai, yeh hai nayee ULTIMATE SABOTAGE! *grin*

Your word is SHIT. You are laid back and relaxed,
and most people like you. You don't especially
want to stand out from the crowd, you are
pretty happy with your lot.


Which Swear (Curse) Word Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

_________________________

Hippie You are 42% Rational, 57% Extroverted, 28% Brutal, and 28% Arrogant.

You are the Hippie! Characterized by a strong sense of extroversion, irrationality, gentleness, and humility, you no doubt frolic through fields preaching peace and love to all! You are probably either very spiritual or needlessly paranoid about "the man", like most hippies, as a result of your focus on intuition and feelings over cold, brutal logic. You are also very, very social. And like any hippie, who would have no qualms about hitchiking across the country just to meet some interesting people, you too love to interact with others, even complete strangers. Because we know most any hippie is peace-loving and humble, it stands to reason that you, as well, are terribly gentle and humble, almost to the point of revulsion. Your carefree attitude of peace and harmony is probably very, very sickening to realists or cynics or anyone who isn't a hippie, to tell the truth. In short, your personality is defective because you are overly emotional, extroverted, gentle, and humble--thus making you an annoying hippie. And you listen to psychadelic rock and smoke a whole lot of pot. Okay, maybe not, but I wouldn't be surprised if you did. To put it less negatively: 1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational. 2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted. 3. You are more GENTLE than brutal. 4. You are more HUMBLE than arrogant. Compatibility: Your exact opposite is the Sociopath. Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Hand-Raiser, the Televangelist, and the Robot. * * If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits. The other personality types: The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 45% on Rationality You scored higher than 55% on Extroversion You scored higher than 24% on Brutality You scored higher than 19% on Arrogance

Link: The Personality Defect Test written by saint_gasoline on OkCupid Free Online Dating

________________________

Minerva Indeed, you are 66% erudite, 33% sensual, 45% martial, and 33% saturnine.

Another virgin Goddess (Diana or Artemis being the other), Minerva was, just like her Greek counterpart Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom and Freedom as well as an all powerful Goddess of War, which made her a most formidable opponent indeed. Among the many disciplines that fell under her control were: writing, the sciences, architecture, embroidery, and just about anything else dealing with artistic skills, wise counsel, and of course battle and warfare. Like Athena, owls were considered sacred to Minerva, representing wisdom. She was a very wise warrior, respected by the Roman legions. She was also, no kidding, the Goddess of Women's Rights and patroness of career women. The Fifteen Goddesses These are the 15 categories of this test. If you score above average in ? ?all or none of the four variables: Neit. ? Erudite: Minerva. ? Sensual: Aphrodite. ? Martial: Artemis. ? Saturnine: Persephone. ? Erudite & Sensual: Isis. ? Erudite & Martial: Sekhmet. ? Erudite & Saturnine: Nemesis. ? Sensual & Martial: Hera. ? Sensual & Saturnine: Bast. ? Martial & Saturnine: Ilamatecuhtli. ? Erudite, Sensual & Martial: Maeve. ? Erudite, Sensual & Saturnine: Freya. ? Erudite, Martial & Saturnine: Sedna. ? Sensual, Martial & Saturnine: Macha.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 19% on erudite You scored higher than 1% on sensual You scored higher than 30% on martial You scored higher than 13% on saturnine

Link: The Mythological Goddess Test written by Nitsuki on Ok Cupid

_________________________

Ki-lin You scored 64% Esotericism, 14% Power, and 14% Malevolence!

A mythical being of Chinese mythology, comparable with the Western unicorn. Ki-lin personifies all that is good, pure, and peaceful. It lives in paradise and only visits the world at the birth of a wise philosopher. The unicorn, which can become one thousand years old, is portrayed as a deer with one horn, the tail of an ox, the hooves of a horse, and a body covered with the scales of a fish. It is one of the four Ling.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 86% on Esotericism You scored higher than 13% on Power You scored higher than 29% on Malevolence

Link: The Mythological Profile Test written by LacedWithASmile on Ok Cupid

_________________________

Obi-Wan Kenobi You scored 84% wisdom, 35% aggression, 57% power, and 79% morality!

You are one of the wisest Jedi of them all, and have had a very eventful career full of failures and successes. You are a skilled fighter, having defeated many powerful opponents in your time. You are not overly aggressive, though. You are more reserved and collected. Your sense of morality is without question, and you are a model Jedi.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 77% on wisdom You scored higher than 33% on aggression You scored higher than 37% on power You scored higher than 61% on morality

Link: The Famous Jedi or Sith Test written by SarumantheMad on Ok Cupid

Undergraduate Kitchen Misadventures or, why I don't have a future in the culinary arts

Now Playing: Garbage - Run Baby Run

I've been trying my hand in the kitchen for the past week or so - and surprisingly, the United Nations has not come a-knockin' at my door to accuse me of creating weapons of mass destruction. You think the billowing black smoke, noxious fumes and screaming civilians would tip someone off, but no - I've been left to brew my broths in peace. (Stir in the witches' spiel from Macbeth, with cackling to taste)

So here's what I've been serving up lately:

• Pasta with seafood sauce (marinara sauce, if you want to get all fancy on me) - this actually came out pretty well, even according to my mother. To be entirely fair, she only said it was good after i went, "how is it how is it tell me tell me its good right don't be mean tell me its good how is it how is it?" ad nauseum ad infinitum.
  
• Pancakes. with blueberries. Yes, I realise it's fairly conventional to add bits of fruit or whatever to pancake mix, but I just discovered this, so humour me, okay? :P
• Beef in black bean sauce - okay, I can't do Chinese food. At all. This was a total unmitigated disaster - a horrible charred mess. The beef took too long to cook, then it charred, and then the gravy disappeared and I was left standing in the shambles that was my kitchen with a smoke alarm going off. I shall stick to restaurant-made chinese food from now on - much easier that way. This week's experiment... Failure. (Anyone gets that reference, you get a blended hot chocolate from Second Cup, my treat :D)
  

Hey, even Nigella Lawson had to start somewhere, right? right?

Hem has decided to quit blogging (again!) - so mourn the passing of one of the better blogs on the block.

And that's it for me. Ta.

Ennui - or the lack thereof -

Now Playing: The Dandy Warhols - The Last High

So, Hem & Vince both redesigned their blogs recently, which prompted me to try and redesign my own slice of the information superhighway. Attempting to redo a website sans any real HTML knowledge? fun, fun, fun. The fact that you are looking at the same old, scratch that, classic, look, should clue you in to the fact that the redesign was unsucessful. I was going for a stark, b&w look, featuring Uryuu Ishida from Bleach. It kinda worked, but not quite - so until I get with the program and learn HTML, the tried and tested look will have to do.

Uryuu who, you ask? That would be this guy -

- just so you know. (All images from the bleach_icons lj community)

And now to present a scene from chez abacus -

Me: You know, I think there's something wrong with my memory! My ability to recall details is totally deteriorating. *shudder*
Brother: Hm. That is funny. I mean, normally, you can remember the most useless details. Something must be wrong with you. Really, really wrong.
Me: Why are you smiling like that?
Brother: No reason. (starts humming "How do you solve a problem like Maria")
Me: That'll teach me to look to you for reassurance! Kung Fu Kidney Jab Of Doom!
Brother: owww.
Me: Ahhh, now I feel better.

Anyway, summer is almost over, and this time, it went by too fast for my liking; none of the usual summer's end ennui, possibly because I actually kept busy this time. I actually worked, for the first time in my life, and it was a job I really enjoyed - being the Verbal Reasoning instructor for students taking the Princeton Review MCAT prep course. Teaching was, for me, a totally new experience - fun, but also entirely nervewracking. I managed to convince myself that every murmur and whisper in class was caused by there being something on my face (in a spectacular display of my customary self-absorption) - which meant I spent much of the class time in an agony of wondering what was wrong with my dress/disposition/face/whatever. Other than that, it was an entirely edifying experience - I now have oodles of respect for anyone who's in any kind of teaching position, and I'll never be able to talk in class ever again.

I finally bought the creative zen - blue, 5 GB - and have named it Fluffy.

Also, no takers for the Interpol concert. Why, oh why, did they have to play on a Wednesday?

Movies seen recently -

• Main Pyar Kyun Kiya: It's good for a David Dhawan movie - Salman Khan and Sushmita Sen are both funny, as is Arshad Warsi in a small role, but Katrina Kaif can't act. Gah.
• Kya Kool Hai Hum: Chock-full of what us Indians refer to as "non-veg" jokes, but still, the funniest movie I've seen in a long while. However, if you can't take really juvenile humour, this isn't the movie for you. Ritesh Deshmukh, Isha Koppikar & Anupam Kher are the standouts in an awesome comedic ensemble.
• Kisna: A good movie, but marred by the 3-hour rule that hindi movies seem to consider sancrosanct. If it had clocked in at two hours or so, it would have been a good movie, but it just kept going and going - like the energizer bunny, except in a bad way. The end result of too much of a good thing (ie - Vivek Oberoi) in this case, is mediocrity.
  

Now off. Ta!

Hearts of Foam and Other Trivial Things...

Now Playing: Parineeta - Piyu Bole

So, I went to the Hot & Spicy Food Festival at the Harbourfront centre yesterday with Julia, Linda, Mimmie & Stephanie. The food was great - I had a nice and spicy jerk chicken roti - and the International Marketplace they have there is always a great place to browse. Anyway, we got seats in front of the CIBC stage, and waited for the live entertainment to begin, & the first artist to perform was this beat poet whose name escapes me utterly. At any rate, she was pretty good, although very angry - "You think I'm Pavlov's Dog/ Well just ring that bell, motherf***er!" Anyway, one of her (other) songs had the lyric, "If my heart was made of foam, it would shatter..." - and so I remark to Steph and Julia, "Argh, that metaphor doesn't hold up! Foam can't shatter!!!" to which they replied, "What foam? She said 'bone'!" - and suddenly the song made a lot more sense. :D

OMG INTERPOL IS IN TORONTO FOR A CONCERT SEPTEMBER 28TH WHO WANTS TO GO WITH ME??? Okay, I love this band, and I really want to go see them - but I really think I'm the only person who listens to their music (that I know), and I don't want to go by myself! :'( So leave me a comment if you're up for a night of awesome indie rock. :D

If anyone has a copy of the song "Ek Pal ki Zindagi" (literally, life lasts only for a moment) from the movie D, please, please let me know. D is an awesome movie describing the rise to uber-don status of the eponymous Deshu ("D for Deshu" - as the opening monologue puts it) . D is meant to be the prologue to Ram Gopal Varma's 2002 film Company, in which Ajay Devgan played mob boss Mallik. I guess Ajay Devgan wasn't available to do the prequel, so they got a new actor, and renamed the character. In any case, it's not a perfect movie by any means - the very fact that it is a prequel removes most of the dramatic tension surrounding Deshu's fate - but it is very well done.

A scene that really impressed me came near the beginning, when Deshu (played by Randeep Hooda) has just returned to Bombay from Dubai because of the death of his mother. At this point, I need to explain that the trains in India generally don't have doors that open and close at each station, and also that trains that run within the city of Bombay itself and the immediate suburbs, stopping at every stop, are called local trains. So, Deshu's riding a local train at night; the compartment is mostly empty - and then, of a sudden, he hears a sudden scream behind him, startling him as much as it does the audience. He goes to investigate, and sees some rough looking guys, but no direct signs of a struggle, nor of the screamer. The camera pans over everyone in the compartment, all looking as though nothing at all had happened, and back to Deshu, who slowly realizes he's not going to get any answers... and he walks back to his old spot.

Also watched recently:

• Parineeta - well made, well acted, but the ridiculous wall-breaking scene at the end was a jarringly sour note in an otherwise note-perfect film.
• Bunty aur Babli - entertaining, but not very rewatchable, I'd think. I did crack up when Rani Mukherjee's Babli said of Amitabh and Abhishek Bachchan's characters, "tum shakal se rishtedar lagte ho!" ("From your faces, you seem to be related") Also of note - the Taj Mahal Sale bit was a total riot - the actor playing the "American" was absolutely hilarious!
  
• Morning Raga - the only redeeming factor was Shabana Azmi's performance as a Carnatic singer traumatized by the deaths of her son and her best friend in an accident - and even that was diminished by the all too obvious fact that Shabana Azmi does not look remotely south Indian, which is what her character is supposed to be. Nevertheless, the performance was note perfect, down to the way she had her hair done, and the way she wore her sari.
• Elaan - if a movie has John Abraham, Arjun Rampal and Rahul Khanna, and I still don't like it? it's a really, really stupid movie.
  

And now off. Have a great long weekend!

PS - got a haircut. now i look like the cookie monster. :S Atleast Megha will be happy. :D

Edited to add -

Your brain: 40% interpersonal, 80% visual, 180% verbal, and 100% mathematical!

Congratulations on being 400% smart! Actually, on my test, everyone is. The above score breaks down what kind of thinking you most enjoy doing. A score above 100% means you use that kind of thinking more than average, and a score below 100% means you use it less. It says nothing about how good you are at any one, just how interested you are in each, relatively. A substantial difference in scores between two people means, conclusively, that they are different kinds of thinkers. Matching Summary: Each of us has different tastes. Still, I offer the following advice, which I think is obvious: Don't date someone if your interpersonal percentages differ by more than 80%. Don't be friends with someone if your verbal percentages differ by more than 100%. Don't have sex with someone if their math percentage is over 200%.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 28% on interpersonal You scored higher than 39% on visual You scored higher than 92% on verbal You scored higher than 69% on mathematical

Link: The 4-Variable IQ Test written by chriscoyne on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Okay, so my interpersonal & visual skills suck - dude, I knew that much already! :D